Saturday, 26 November 2011
Things will get better, they say. Live life like you always do & in no tyme, better will find its way to you. I shall migrate my mind to a different place so atleast i can breath a fresher air. Cover my awkwardness with confidence. Look up straight to their eyes & maybe i can see things a lot better that way. For sure. If i still insist on waiting, then i shall wait with no expectation. Soon it will all be a silly dream of my young days. Soon, it will be over. Soon enough, i will feel e warmth by e touch of a man whom i be able to love. The soon, can be tday tmrw or years to come. Still it shall cross my path one fyne day. Nt all wishes come true, & i'm not that bad for atleast some of my wish to come alive. I'm nt fillial neither am i evil, as i am made of flesh & blood with brain & heart. Lyke all e human ard me, i deserve to be happy in my own little world.
Angels♥
10:31
Saturday, 12 November 2011
Admitting to the truth. Harder than i thought. When the truth is , im e loser & she's the winner. She has always been the winner. From the start. All of them trying their best to make me feel comfortable, when deep inside me i know i'm the unreasonable heartless woman. You know how hard it is having your 1st love whom you waited for so long playing games like he always did to you. How very hard it is to muster up courage to make the bloodly first move & ended up being a laughing stock. Having your confidence drain out each tyme seeing the girl who hates you? How hard it is to try loving someone & ended up being an asshole. How hard it is to find someone in your contact to ask them along as a partner when everyone is bringing one & lasty ended up with no one. Or how hard it is to hve each of them talking to their partner & you just scrolling ur iphone looking thru fb & twitter countless tyme. Or even sitting in a theater on a couple seat alone? How bout this, telling ut closest friend that you've long move on. Answering the same question with the same answer. Meeting guys here & there just for the sake meeting. Having a real hard tyme and knowing that you hve no one to complain to. Pleasing evryone so they will feel good. Trying ur hardest not to dissapoint anyone. Being the one who jokingly stopping a couple fight. Walking in a pathway alone with others laughing away with their love one. Or how to react when they say its okay even if you come alone joining us. Or when they talk in group language that u dont belong and pretending to be sleepy as an excuse not to disturb them. Or how hard it is to think that even w/out u, u know they can be happy & w/out them, you're over? This is the truth behind every fact. Which is more in me that most dont know. Because im a good actress, a good liar, a good pretender & as you can see im a good example for a drough in a sunny land or flood in a rainy days.
Angels♥
10:59
